confessions of a post-injury runner

It’s been a while since I’ve written here. I’d apologize but it’s really not that I’ve forgotten about the blog, it’s that I’ve been afraid of jinxing myself.  Things in my running world have been going relatively well and I’m not used to such success and the possibility of *gulp* actually running a race I’ve been training for.

Let’s take a look back for a minute. Almost exactly a year ago I was training for the Lake Placid Half Marathon in June, 2011. I developed some weird hip issue that never got fully diagnosed, had to take too many weeks off of training and couldn’t complete that race or the Brooklyn Half Marathon a few weeks before it. I was upset but decided it was alright because my glory race of 2011 was going to be the New York City Marathon. I had been building it up in my head, with my friends (most of them also runners) and had told all my donors that I would run a race to honor their generous contributions. I started training in June 2011, hip issue on the mend, and enjoyed a great summer of humid runs and many Saturday morning breakfast sandwiches. Then came Labor Day weekend. I ran 12 miles that Saturday and felt a little stiffer than usual during my recovery run Sunday but didn’t think much of it. Come Tuesday for our 2nd 5k test at practice and the pain in my leg was so weird and severe that after slowly making my way around the 3.1 miles I was almost in tears. Long story short, I had a stress fracture in my right tibia and couldn’t run the New York City Marathon either.  I was crushed.

To make a long saga short, 2011 was full of looking forward to races, getting injured, and instead cheering from the sidelines of many races that I was supposed to be running. I had a fun time with my teammates and made some great friends but was terribly frustrated and embarrassed at my inability to make it to the start line of any significant race. One can only take sitting on the bench for so long.

Fast forward to now. I’ve been training for the San Diego Rock n Roll Half Marathon since January and things are actually going ok. I’m strength training two days a week, running only 2-3 days, seeing my PT pretty regularly for tune-ups and feeling good. This past week we completed our 2nd 5k test so I have officially made it farther into this season than the previous two. I might actually run this thing.

I’ve been reluctant to update this blog to say things were going well because I’ve been afraid. It was embarrassing to have to email all my supporters and tell them sorry, I won’t be running this race either, that I can’t imagine having to do it a third time. I don’t even like when people ask me how the season is going. I keep thinking if I’m just quiet about my success that nothing will screw it up. Alas, here I am, admitting my healthy running. Fingers crossed, knocking on all wood, and holding all lucky charms, I will run the relay I’m planning on in Buffalo May 27th and the half in San Diego June 3rd.

Just posting this is giving me such anxiety. Time to pretend it didn’t happen and keep running.

why run?

An internet-savvy runner friend of mine recently posted a link to 10 Reasons Running Doesn’t Suck As Much As You Think. I gotta say I agree with and love all of those answers. The biggest lesson I’ve learned in the last two years of running is that it has more benefits than I probably even realize. It has changed my whole life.

After reading this list and writing about running for a few of my grad school apps (yay public health!), I’ve decided to make a list of the things running has taught me in two years of pavement pounding.

1. Speed a runner does not make. Sure, some people can run at a 7 minute/mile pace for a whole marathon but I will likely never be one of those people. That does not make me less of a runner. In fact, I like the reminder that it is actually more difficult to take 5 or 6 hours to run a marathon than 3 or 4 because you’re out there for so much longer!
2. I am tough. 20 degrees and snowing or 90 degrees and humid, I’ve run in it all and it was certainly not always pleasant.  Doing it is what counts and I’ll have the bragging rights forever. I especially love running in the rain, completely enjoying myself while passing miserable people huddled under umbrellas.
3. Strength training is important. All kinds, all ways, all over, all the time. It helps in the bikini wearing department too.
4. Running can be a team sport. Yes it takes my legs and only mine to finish every mile, but having an entire support team along the way to run alongside me or yell words of encouragement makes all the difference. I’ll have Team In Training for the rest of my life and I know that if I wear my purple in a race I’m guaranteed to hear at least one “Go Team!” as I pass by. I would not be the runner I am without the TEAM.
5. Running makes me a more pleasant person. I’m less stressed out, more even keeled, happier, have more energy and a generally better outlook on life. The other day I was grumbling about something to a long-distance friend and she asked “have you been running?” Good point.
6. I need a drying rack. Between runs and physical therapy and bootcamp these days, almost half my laundry every two weeks is running clothes. I don’t put them in the dryer so I end up with a pile of wet, synthetic-fabric’d clothing to hang to dry all over my apartment. It’s not a pretty site and I think it’s time I invest in a drying rack.
7. Perseverance. Just keep going and remind yourself you can do it and you will. It’s amazing how many things I apply that to.
8. I could spend my whole paycheck on running clothes and paraphernalia. Jackets, socks, headbands, foam rollers, shoes, bags…it’s really a problem.
9. Self discipline. I’ve never been very good in this department but running has definitely helped me ignore that little voice in my head that says “just stay in your pajamas,” or “one more cookie doesn’t really count.”
10. I like goals. This is also something I’ve brought to the rest of my life. I’m more likely to run if I have a race to train for. I’ll work harder if there’s a time goal. I’ll focus better if there is a finish line to the mind-numbing work I’m forced to complete.

I’m sure I’ve left things out so expect a part 2 to this one day.

oscar pool take 2!

My second Oscar Pool was a repeated success! The pot tipped the scales at over $300 and some of the winnings got sent right back to me to be donated to LLS. I’m happy to report that last week I donated $215 to my fundraising page from the pool. On top of that $40 more was put up on my behalf! Again I am impressed by the generosity of my friends, family and teammates.

Whether or not I’m raising money with Team In Training I think I’ll do a charity Oscar pool every year. So many people commented that it made watching the show even more fun and I love a good way to raise money for good causes.

Onto March Madness…

a video!

I woke up this morning to Brooklyn covered in its first blanket of snow of the season. Like a little kid on Christmas, I can’t ever go back to sleep when I wake up on a morning of new snow. I blame it on growing up without snowy winters and I hope I’m this excited about snow for the rest of my life. So what did I do? I went for a run.

As you can read on my fundraising page, I’m running this season in memory of my friend Mark. Today is the celebration of his life in El Cerrito, CA and I’m sad I cannot go. I decided yesterday that instead of moping around my house today and being upset that I can’t be there that I would run. This morning I ran and I thought about Mark and I enjoyed the beautiful, snow-covered Prospect Park.

I also made a video! exciting!

I’m pretty hardcore. Turns out running on fresh snow is not so different from running on lumpy sand. Hard work!

familiar territory

Here I go down the road of another season with TNT. This time I’m making myself train for only the half (only! when did I become that person?!) and all fingers and toes are crossed for a successful season. I’ve been squatting and bending and rolling and stretching and working hard to start off on the right foot. First preseason practice is next week!

http://pages.teamintraining.org/nyc/rnr12/chorvitssc

quick update

You might be wondering how my running is doing now that we’re fully engulfed in the highest calorie intake season of the year. The answer is that it’s not doing but that hopefully it will be soon. Let’s all cross our fingers my waistline doesn’t expand too much in the meantime.

In order to give my stress fractured tibia extra extra time to heal I haven’t run since the Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving. I’ve been going a little stir crazy, it’s true, but trying to keep up with spin classes and strength training. A good hour of heart-pumping spin class is almost as satisfying as running 6 miles. Almost.

Physical Therapy is still literally kicking my butt but it’s been fun. Brynn does the workouts with me sometimes and I like waking up a little sore and feeling like I actually did something worthwhile. I’ve been trying to do some of the moves on my own once or twice a week, too.

Here’s to hoping I can run by the new year. I think it’s looking good.

trotting along

Turkey Trot 5-miler on Thanksgiving morning: check. Rachel and I run-walked the whole thing to minimize leg stress and it was great.  Beautiful morning, fun company and only a bit of leg and hip pain toward the end.  It felt good to actually do a race I signed up for.  Onward!

thankful

In a year of lots of related disappointment I am still thankful for running. Specifically, I am thankful for the Brooklyn Team in Training crew who has thoroughly supported, motivated and entertained me despite my frequent placement on the sidelines.

I am thankful that even when I wasn’t running at our practices I was always welcomed, invited and included however I could be. I’ve spent a lot of Tuesday and Wednesday nights meeting the group for a meal and a beer once they finished running a few miles. Of course I’d rather run and then down a burger but it’s a lot harder to wallow in self-pity when you’re surrounded by so many smiling, positive, understanding faces.  It has made a huge difference to be able to talk about my frustrations with friends who have very nearly been in my shoes. I have also greatly enjoyed celebrating the medals and finish line crossings of so many people I have gotten to know so well.  I even crossed a few finish lines with them.

I am thankful for the inspirational, touching stories my teammates have shared about why they run and raise money for LLS.  Crying before a run isn’t the most glamorous but I am never short of people and stories to think about when I need that extra push.  People I run with have raised tens of thousands of dollars for cancer research and patient services and that will never not inspire me.  It’s easy to focus on the miles and the electrolytes and the breakfast sandwiches but all of us are out there for something so much bigger than ourselves.  The opportunity to be part of such a group is great reason for thanks.

This  November is the first since I moved to New York almost three years ago that I received an invitation to Thanksgiving dinner and I got not one but three invites.  All came from running teammates and coaches who I now call my friends and that is certainly something to be thankful for.  Thanks to these wonderful people I’ll be spending my turkey day at two different meals with a whole slew of people who are the reason why I feel better and better about my life in Brooklyn every day.

Thank you for forcing me to make something of my Saturday mornings. Thank you for appreciating my cowbell ringing. Thank you for the traditions. Thank you for making rain feel badass. Thank you for turning me into a runner. Thank you for listening to my whining. Thank you for keeping me from whining. Thank you for sharing your stories. Thank you for talking endlessly about shoes and salt and gu and wicking and spandex and medals and paces and PRs. Thank you for filling my facebook newsfeed. Thank you for helping me love Brooklyn. Thank you for being a community in this humongous city.

Thank you for being my friends.

ok sap time is over. I must prepare for my return to the running world tomorrow: the turkey trot.

ow!

I’m writing this on my phone on the subway home from my first physical therapy session post-stress fracture. I worked my glutes and quads so much I’m not entirely sure I’ll be able to exit the train when it gets to my stop.

We’ve now officially entered the “strength training” phase of recovery and it’s going to be some serious work. I’ve been seeing the same physical therapist, Brynn, since I first had IT band issues training for marathon #1 a year and a half ago. We’ve been through several injuries together and I always look forward to seeing her. We have a bit more than a typical PT-patient relationship at this point so it’s always a lot of joking around. Tonight when I walked in she gave me her evil, “I’m about to torture you” look and asked if I brought shorts. Yes, I have clothes to work out in and oh no, what am I getting myself into??

Various forms of shaky one legged squats and lunges- some with a kettle bell- and a lot of stomach-churning stability holds later, I was sweating and whining. Brynn laughed and reminded me this is just the beginning. Ow! Even walking down the subway stairs was a little iffy. I don’t want to think about tomorrow morning.

I know this is all to benefit my running and, honestly, that makes me excited. I want to feel strong and like I can not only keep running but actually improve. I want to work on my form and maybe even, dare I say it, get faster. I don’t want to feel like I’m just barely holding off an injury or struggling to keep up with the group. I know I can be more successful and accomplish more with my running than I have been and torturing myself with serious strength training is the start. This is the beginning of good things but damn it hurts.

At least the visit ended with sitting on the floor eating mini cupcakes together. That part wasn’t so bad…until I had to get up.

goodbye 2011

All in all, 2011 was a failure on the running front and I’m glad to see it come to an end. This year I stood on the sidelines and cheered at a total of 5 races I was supposed to be running. That, my readers, is a lot. The Alley Pond 5 miler, Brooklyn Half Marathon, Lake Placid Half Marathon, Staten Island Half Marathon and The New York City Marathon this past weekend. It was all fun and supportive and I love seeing my teammates succeed, but I’ve reached my limit. I’m ready for someone to cheer for me.

On Monday I ran for the first time since labor day and it gave me hope. It was only 20 minutes at close to a snail’s pace but it was running. I sweat and looked at the fall leaves and it made my whole day better. I’m embarrassingly sore for such a short jaunt but I know that if I keep it up my body will remember what we’re doing out there.

I’m registered for two 5-mile races before the end of the year and my goal is to finish them, even if I end up at the back of the pack. The first is a Thanksgiving morning turkey trot in my local park. Many of my friends are running and I’ll get a medal with a turkey on it and hot chocolate. How could I not? The other is a race in central park in December to complete my nine qualifying races for next year’s marathon. I’m just hoping its not too cold and that we eat good brunch afterwards.

So here’s to the end of 2011’s running seasons and literally starting 2012 on the right foot. My new running year’s resolution is to work to get my whole body stronger and focus on one race at a time instead of a whole year’s worth. Toes crossed things go my way.